Not quite so long and rambly a post

I love blogging. All that free advice, and so very wise.

OK, here's a quick update. I'm not asking for comments, really, because I think I've got to find my own way through this, and because you all came so good on the last post, I hate to consume more than my fair share of your time and thoughts (though if you have a word of wisdom, I'm always grateful!).

Turns out that instead of fundraising or library work, I should really be in negotiation. I told my current workplace that I'm looking for jobs, and have an interview in the offing, and explained why, and the net result was that they offered a fabulous package which involved:

• re-allocating one or two bits of my job which are time-consuming
• an acknowledgement that I've said what I've said about the fundraising target, so if I don't meet it, then it's the Board's responsibility and not mine, and (and this one's the gem)
• as much holiday as I like, (yes, even the 15 weeks I mentioned which is what the school hols are) so long as I fit in my two days a week around it.

I mean, blimey. Blimey O'Reilly.

Seems like something of a no-brainer*, but meanwhile, I've been getting keener on the idea of the Library Assistant job too. I didn't really know what it involved, so went to have an informal chat with the Librarian. I have an interview not this coming week (half-term), but next. I used to feel I would keep my sanity by having a life outside the school bubble, but I'm beginning to see that there is a lot of sanity to be gained by jumping into the bubble more whole-heartedly and belonging to it more fully. And I like libraries.

Incidentally, I didn't get the other fundraising job that I was interviewed for, but quite honestly, I'm not going to find a part-time fundraising job that is a better package than the one now on the table where I am. Good to rule that option out, though, in terms of the decision-making process.

So at the moment, I'm just trying to hang loose of it all, and stop spinning my mental wheels, in the hope that if I disengage my conscious mind, which is never going to reach an answer on this one, then my subconscious might come up with the goods. Go, Subconscious, go! I've stripped back the decision of all that extraneous stuff, like what will other people think, and what battles for working mothers I'm representing (the personal being political, and all that), and what role model I am. I'm just trying to feel my way into what would be the nicest life for me and those near and dear to me in the here and now, and then I know the rest will follow.

What already feels nice, is looking at July/August, and being able to make a few extra plans, without the pressure of having to zoom back from holiday or seeing family, or having to go into work while our friends from America are visiting.


* I don't want to look this particular gift horse in the mouth, but actually, it's not quite as simple as it might seem. I can't say too much (blogging never being anonymous and all that), but you'll get the gist of it if I say that in a small workplace, much depends on the personalities and working practices of a few key individuals... I won't say more than that. But a gift horse is a gift horse, and this one is laden with goodies, so I'm trying my best to avert my gaze from its open jaw - whilst also being realistic about how it might all work out in practice.

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